Union Pacific Railroad

This railroad safety film has the dubious honor of being mocked by Mystery Science Theater 3000 in one of their episodes, “Radar Secret Service”. A YouTube link to the MST3K version is provided below.

Basically the message is, don’t try to beat the train to the crossing – sound advice – but there’s a whole plethora of neat, old ’59 Fords and Chevys being driven, rather ineptly, by my fellow Idahoans, sometimes with disastrous results. (Thanks for the car ID’s, Mark!)

Beside the blurred streamliner images, trackside views include EMD F units, GP9s, switchers and even an Alco-GE gas turbine-electric locomotive.

Will the Idaho State Police get the word about railroad safety through people’s thick skulls? Let’s find out.

UP owned a fleet of EMD E8’s and E9’s seen here flashing past the camera in southern Idaho. Passenger trains of the era included #105/#106 City of Portland, #17/#18 Portland Rose and Mail and Express #11/#12. Portland Rose was the only train that traversed the Boise area in daylight.

A young whippersnapper in his zippy, little sports car (an Austin Healy), overtakes a station wagon at the crossing. Not content to wait for #17 to pass, he just barely avoids getting crushed by the lead E unit as the Portland Rose sails past at 90mph.

With appropriate dirge music playing in the background, the funeral procession has just about finished turning into the Kohlerlawn cemetery in Nampa, Idaho. And wouldn’t you know, the graveyard is still there per Google Maps.

ISP Patrolman Hal Jackson pulls up alongside in his 1959 Ford police car. Hey, it’s “Mac” (William Boyett) from One-Adam-12!!

Why, that’s Frank Dixon, Jr., just home from college. His best girl, Betty Hutchins has been waiting for him, of course. They head down to the local burger joint.

Over at the Meridian, ID depot (just west of Boise), Mr. Dixon is picking up his new tractor (an Allis Chambers) from the U.P. freight agent. Frank’s kid brother Alan just passed his driving test and wants to take the Big Wheel for a spin.

With Betty by his side, Frank Jr. pilots the tractor home. Current day view, the depot is long gone.

Turning onto Main Street, The Meridian Mill (ex-Purina) is still there as of 2024 at 611 N Main St.

The warning signs are there for people to heed, including this ancient (even for back then) “Look Out For The Cars” sign and the very cool wig-wag “Automatic Flagman”.

But, no. Frank Junior is out sowing his wild oats in the Healy, and Officer Mac pulls his sorry ass over.

Patrolman Jackson figures he better stop by the Dixon place and give the entire, extended family a safety lecture. Including Grandpa. It boils down to distractions and inattentive driving.

You can’t get more distracting for a railfan than to see a UP Alco-GE Gas Turbine “Big Blow” lumbering down the tracks!

Or this comely lass strutting her stuff, causing her date to peel out – and nearly sideswiping the Chevy coming up on his six. Always check your mirrors, folks!

Gah! It’s an Edsel! And it’s coming right at us!!!

Junior and Betty are out cruising, and stop for the flashing crossbuck. It turns out to be a slow wayfreight featuring a UP switcher with “Route of the Streamliners” on the cab and a safety slogan caboose bringing up the markers.

Nonplussed by the slow-moving wayfreight at the last crossing, Frank Jr. now blows past the flashing crossbuck JUST missing being struck by an EMD F3/GP9 combo towing a “Be Specific – Ship Union Pacific” box car.

Old men wearing hats and driving station wagons (on the wrong side of the road), are highly susceptible to mishaps at grade crossings. This old codger narrowly misses a fast-moving freight.

Despite the furiously-waving crossing signal, Gramps nearly starts off — into the path of Train #17, The Portland Rose on the SECOND main track. How about that ACF dome car on the streamliner!

Betty and Frank Jr. are getting bolder and more reckless as they zoom around Meridian. They’ll pay. They completely miss that snazzy flashing crossbuck with the glass marbles.

Their luck finally runs out as the Streamliner reduces their car to scrap metal (notice it’s not the Healy). We do get some swell views of the rear car on #18 and its mars light attached to the end gate. Two railroaders shake their heads saying, “Why don’t they look?”.

If you’d like to view the feature I reviewed yourself, the link is below:

That is, if it’s still on YouTube.

ALSO: You can view the MST3K version as well (with the usual YouTube caveats):
Last Clear Chance MST3K starts at the 5:45 mark.

Here’s what IMDb has to say about Last Clear Chance:
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0246747/

If you have ANY information about this movie you’d like to share, please contact me at: Lindsay.Korst@gmail.com, or leave a comment.  Thanks and enjoy the blog!

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